Every once in a while you have to examine your life and purge the dead weight. I am going through one such time now. Best Buy was to the point where I realized that the issues I had there were never going to improve so I quit. My last day was Saturday the 2nd of October which strangely enough was the one year anniversary of the store opening. I started a new part time job I got in an Chiropractic office recently and love it. I'm still nervous and learning TONS every day but a) it's in the field my degree is in, b) has more potential for the future, c) is 8-4 week days so I'm home with my children at night and d) is only 10 min from home instead of 45. I am learning to be a Chiropractic Assistant there - taking blood pressures, etc. It's all very exciting to me. The doctor is also very into natural remedies which REALLY interests me. It seems like an honest to goodness God-sent to me.
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Also...... I decided to end youth group and the youth rec center all together. Both of which I'd work so hard to get lessons and snack and money around for just to sit there alone. I gave both the college try (youth rec center one year) but to continue to do something that's not working is the definition of insane. I'm not sad about closing the youth house either because I truly gave it all I had. I feel like the trying has to count even if the action is a total flop.
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Youth group response has been under whelming and as we tried different things I tried to think about what the difference was between the youth group I grew up in and the one I was trying to run. All of the sudden one night recently it hit me like a ton of bricks: the parents. My youth group as a child and teen loved Jesus and we wanted to follow Jesus and lead others to him and were passionate but the difference was our parents were ALL fully in love with Jesus and themselves shared Christ. Without this element our youth group never had a chance. I can bang my head against the wall til the cows come home but if youth see their parents living "good lives" but with Jesus only being a small piece of the pie (if any at all) then they will naturally feel no need to make him anything more. I will continue to hang with and mentor the few kids that showed up on a regular basis via taking them out to eat, going to their sports games etc. But as for an open invitation gathering, no.
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My heart has been tugged HARD upon by the Lord recently by the overwhelming stat that 26,000 children die PER DAY of hunger related causes. I have cried, I have pondered, I have brainstormed, and I have felt helpless over this fact... what the heck can I do to even put a dent in this number? I mean I sponsor a few kids through Compassion and give to missions here and there but I don't want this stat to be true. I want this stat to decrease a lot in my life time. but how?
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Rob was the one to convince me to end youth group and focus more on this cry of my heart for the time being because God puts things on our hearts for a reason. I'm not sure how that will translate yet... probably some fasting so I can really FEEL hungry like they do and prayer.... maybe I will gain some clarity then.... not sure....
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My daughter has also been very effected by the poor around the world lately. This summer in bible school she learned about Haiti and what happened there and ever since has been giving her money to missions and trying to come up with ideas to help poor children. She draws pictures of people handing out aid and asks me many questions. I tear up every time at her heart for the poor. We are getting ready to make shoe boxes for Samaritan's Purse and she and Mal are excited to shop for the items they will each make for a child their age. Honestly, THEY challenge me all the time with their generosity and how they really get "do unto others as you would have it done unto you".
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I graduate in about 4 weeks. Life is changing..... but life is good.
1 comment:
As I read this, It sounds like you are at peace with all the decisions you are making. Good for you. Life is good and you and your daughter are also doing something good. "do unto others as you would have it done unto you” is something we should all live by. She is a very smart girl.
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